Building Deep, Fulfilling Love Requires the Care and Patience of a Craftsman
A happily married couple of 56 years shares personal moments that demonstrate how consistent, intentional efforts build a loving relationship.
Lifestyle
By Mark and Jan Yokers
Hooray for St. Valentine’s Day!
My wife, Jan, and I have been married for 56 years. We love that there’s a day set aside to celebrate love and appreciation. It feels special to pause and say, “You matter to me.”
We’re not big on buying cards for each other, though. Years ago, Jan had one of her many brilliant ideas: instead of spending money on cards that might get tucked away in a drawer, we bought a small journal covered with roses. On special occasions, we write love notes to each other and keep them there. Over time, it has become a treasured collection of our shared life—simple words that carry deep meaning.
For us, Valentine’s Day is beautiful because of all the ordinary days that surround it. The months of steady, committed love before and after February 14 are what make the expressions on that day so deeply felt.
That reminds me of a gift I once made for Jan.
She’s almost a foot shorter than I am, and from the time we were first married, she would sometimes get a kink in her neck when we kissed standing up. I’d bend down, or we’d find a step to stand on—but I decided to come up with a more permanent solution.
So, in secret, I went to work in the garage. I designed and built what I called a “Kissy Stool.” It was a solid oak stool, about nine inches high, with a heart-shaped cutout in the top and on the legs. It took a long time to build. There were plenty of careful measurements, adjustments, and finishing touches along the way. But surprising Jan with it made every minute worthwhile.
Forty years later, that little stool is still in use.
Building deep, fulfilling love is much the same. It takes time. It takes patience. It takes intentional effort, just like crafting something by hand. But when you invest consistently—when you keep showing up and shaping something beautiful together—the result will last a lifetime.
We’ve learned so much over the years, and we’re looking forward to sharing some of those lessons in future articles. We hope you’ll join us on the journey.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
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